switch baby houses. And this is exactly what we are doing. It's been an emotionally charged and draining few days and I haven't been that into blogging because I hate that I have to keep re-living the poopy moments...
I just have to start off by saying, if you and your partner set up a plan- try not to deviate from that plan. Try to stick to what you guys set out for yourself because there has to be some rhyme or reason as to why you came up with said plan. So, with this being said... J was scheduled to go into the doctor for her first blood test last Friday- this day was designated as the final day of her two week waiting. But because we are paying for all our appointments, blood work and IUI's out of pocket... saving every penny helps. So, before we started this cycle, J and I decided that we wouldn't go in for our blood test on Friday. We decided that we would wait through the weekend to see if the dreaded visitor Aunt Flow came (because her period is like clockwork these days) and save ourselves the $161. Sounds good in theory, right?! Well, J has been obsessed with forums and the infamous CCB Friends Page on FB... and she read somewhere from some neurotic mommy-to-be that we are able to get a positive blood test as soon as Day 12. So on Day 12 she had me schedule a doctor's appointment so she could go in on Day 13 to just finally find out once and for all.
We go into the doctor first thing in the morning, and LITERALLY TWO HOURS LATER... she started her period. Yup- FREAKING AUNT FLOW came knocking... so needless to say, when our doctor called to tell us the results... A BFN but instead of the word Fat... replace the F with a much more colorful expletive. Damn it.
We had her ultra sound to see if we could just jump in and try again for October and she has cysts on her right side. Double Damn it... At that point, I go into crisis resolution mode. I instantly realize her body may not be ready to house our baby. Her body may be telling us something. Yes, I know... it's only IUI number 2. But have I mentioned how impatient we are?! This time we felt like we did everything we could possibly have done to create the most optimum results and STILL no baby inside her belly. :( So, I proposed to her that maybe we give her body a break for the next few months... and maybe we try with me.
Although there are MANY challenging aspects to having a baby with two people who have identical plumbing... one of the great things is that both J and I want to have at least one pregnancy. So, we have decided that for the month of October, we will try with me.
How do I feel about this? Hmm... kind of nervous, mostly excited. The excitement of having a baby has taken over me and I have never felt this excited about being a mom. I did get used to the fact that J was going to be the one carrying, but I never looked at that as the baby being more hers and less mine. From very early on, I looked at it as the baby being ours.
So for right now... we are trying to pick up the pieces from the negative test and trying to get excited and wrap our heads around me carrying our baby. I went in to get the blood work done yesterday and I am in the waiting game of waiting for my period so we can see what's going on with my plumbing. Hopefully all is good and we get the green light to proceed.
Right now... we are proceeding with caution. But we are definitely thankful and excited that we even have the opportunity to be able to try with both of us.
For now, hope all are doing well in this extremely stressful process. I will keep you all posted when my lovely Aunt Flow comes. :)
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